Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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