watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize