Just cropdusted the office
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
