Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
