is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize