How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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