Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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