D3 body, D1 cock
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize