Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize