We won't sleep together?
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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