so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
