his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
