I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize