i just google imaged poop.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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