The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Randomize
