So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize