He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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