it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
