It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
