I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
