how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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