my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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