I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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