hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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