if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
