There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
