Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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