Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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