hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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