Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
