Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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