I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
tell me about the eggs
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
