he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
