Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
