He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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