Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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