people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
