It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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