I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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