get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
