I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
