Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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