plz talk dirty to me
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
