Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
