Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
