I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize