So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
