i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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