covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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