so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize