I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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